To let you know that if you don't hear from us, we're still alive. It's just...you know, end of the school year, finals coming up, I'm going to be studying like mad and all. You might hear from Daniel, though. He really has nothing to do, poor guy. I'm surprised he doesn't complain about being bored more often.
Also, I heard about...
...You know what's awful is that it's such a nice day outside. No one should have to die on a day like this.
I'm so sorry, Ava.
Reach...thank you. For everything you've done for us.
~Alora
Friday, April 29, 2011
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Keep Your Hopes Up High...
...And your head down low.
That's my new motto and I'm sticking to it.
Things have been pretty quiet since Daniel's journey into the dark corners of his consciousness. This doesn't mean we're any safer, but it's nice change of pace (although now that I said that we're going to wake up to find Slender in the room with Cthuthlu, ready to make blood sacrifices out of us).
I mentioned this on Twitter, and I'm going to say it again: DANIEL IS SO SOUTHERN. It's a riot. His voice is all quiet with this soft southern accent. If he weren't eight years older than me I'd say it was kind of hot.
stop making people think we're an item!
He's been paranoid about that lately. I keep trying to tell him, shippers gonna ship, no matter what you do, but he won't listen. Ah, well.
Anyway, random supercomputer! Weird, huh? I'm not sure if I can trust it or not, but for now, it seems benign at least. At the very least, it could be a good source of information. I'm neutral, at least for now.
lies. her first reaction was, "oh shit, it's skynet. we're all gonna die."
OI! That was an understandable reaction!
To be honest, I'm more interested in the fact thatOrsos Osort/RT/Skynet was being partially run by a couple of Redlights. Especially in the light of our recent revelation. I can't believe they actually thought Daniel would be a Redlight. Morons. From what I can piece together, he was as Lawful Good as they come. Neutral Good at the very least.
can't blame them for trying. that's what slender man does, uses people. if he can't, he takes them out, because they're not worth his time. we're starting to think that slender man is "the unfettered", although what his ultimate goal is is still a mystery. and yes, i go on tv tropes now. there isn't much else to do in this tiny single, and i get bored.
His ultimate goal could be chaos.
if that's the case, we are royally f*cked.
Yeah, basically.
And on that happy note...stay safe, guys.
~Alora
-daniel
That's my new motto and I'm sticking to it.
Things have been pretty quiet since Daniel's journey into the dark corners of his consciousness. This doesn't mean we're any safer, but it's nice change of pace (although now that I said that we're going to wake up to find Slender in the room with Cthuthlu, ready to make blood sacrifices out of us).
I mentioned this on Twitter, and I'm going to say it again: DANIEL IS SO SOUTHERN. It's a riot. His voice is all quiet with this soft southern accent. If he weren't eight years older than me I'd say it was kind of hot.
stop making people think we're an item!
He's been paranoid about that lately. I keep trying to tell him, shippers gonna ship, no matter what you do, but he won't listen. Ah, well.
Anyway, random supercomputer! Weird, huh? I'm not sure if I can trust it or not, but for now, it seems benign at least. At the very least, it could be a good source of information. I'm neutral, at least for now.
lies. her first reaction was, "oh shit, it's skynet. we're all gonna die."
OI! That was an understandable reaction!
To be honest, I'm more interested in the fact that
can't blame them for trying. that's what slender man does, uses people. if he can't, he takes them out, because they're not worth his time. we're starting to think that slender man is "the unfettered", although what his ultimate goal is is still a mystery. and yes, i go on tv tropes now. there isn't much else to do in this tiny single, and i get bored.
His ultimate goal could be chaos.
if that's the case, we are royally f*cked.
Yeah, basically.
And on that happy note...stay safe, guys.
~Alora
-daniel
Sunday, April 24, 2011
one: happy easter. glad to be alive.
two: yeah, we know about the computer. alora kept booting me off every three seconds to read the comments people are leaving. it's...pretty surreal.
three: the self-mind reading was a success and...
and i know now.
i know why i ended up like this.
it was in there, locked up. i mean that literally. when i...went inside my own mind, i don't know what you'd call it, i was in a room. it was a disaster. there were boxes everywhere, some opened and dumped over, some closed, all stacked haphazardly. there was dust everywhere, and the walls were covered in writing.
i'm not crazy. i'm not a monster. open the box open the box. don't open the box.he is coming. he will find you.
the handwriting was my own. i guess i'm crazier than i thought.
but i wasn't the only one there, because when i looked up from the writing on the walls...
he was there.
and the man in red.
and i was there. except it was me before all of this, with no scars and a voice. other me had a rope around his neck, not that he showed any signs he wanted to run away. he was just sitting on the ground, writing on the walls more. muttering.
hello daniel
i remembered that voice.
there's something we want to show you daniel
and the man in red handed me a key.
i wasn't sure i wanted to take it. if he wanted me to see it, it must be bad. but then other me looked at me. met my eyes and nodded.
i took the key.
the key opened one of the boxes, and in the box was a memory.
i had been investigating a series of murders in my town. the murders i remembered before...we had no idea who was responsible. we just thought it was another human being. a very sick human being, granted, but a human nonetheless.
we didn't have any leads. then i received the note.
the tutorial. getuphigh.blogspot.com
that was when it started. i read so many of the blogs. some of the people i know now...dreams in darkness...that's how i knew their names, scott. it was that blog that made me realize this wasn't just a game.
i had two theories. one, someone had also read these blogs and decided it would be fun to play slender man.
the other...
well, maybe this was real.
of course, i didn't tell anyone about that theory. how could i? if i walked up to the police chief and announced that i thought the murders were being performed by an eldritch abomination that shouldn't exist, i would be laughed out of the station. i didn't even tell alice.
i was about to tell the others about the first theory, when i received another message. this time it was a voice message, telling me to meet him at this old cabin near some woods. i did the stupid thing and went by myself. i was a bit of a moron back then.
but i didn't really know what i was dealing with. i mean...i knew what slender man was, i knew about his mooks, and i knew what both were capable of. but i wasn't quite willing to believe it was real. not entirely.
when i went to the location, i met him for the first time. a man in a red sweater, standing in the darkest corner of the room.
he said his name was redlight.
he told me that it was slender man who was killing those people, and that they weren't important. i was the one he wanted to talk to. he told me that i had certain abilities. i know what he was talking about now, but at the time i thought he was just talking out his ass. then he told me that he was like me. and there were other redlights like me. not many, but they existed. and he wanted me to work for them.
he wanted me to be a redlight.
i turned him down, partially because i thought the entire thing was bullshit, and partially because i knew what redlight could do, and i wasn't going to be a part of it. i went to leave and when i turned around...
he was there. slender man, in the flesh. everything seemed to stop. i couldn't move, i could barely breathe. and let me tell you, he did not look happy, but his anger was directed at redlight. redlight was talking to slender man, and i don't remember all of what he said because i wasn't paying attention. i was torn between panicking and trying to figure out how to get out of there. but before i could figure anything out, slender man was looking at me. and i heard his voice in my head: you will join me
come to me
and...i wanted to.
he was terrifying and repulsive and i knew what he had done, but i wanted to. i wanted to join him. i even took a few steps towards him.
but--and i don't know how i did this--i snapped out of it. i actually pulled out my gun and told him i wasn't going anywhere with him. i think i may have said that he was under arrest, because that would explain why redlight started laughing.
slender man did it again, but this time he pushed harder. come to me, child
i remember walking towards him, even though i didn't want to. i was inches from him when i managed to make my feet stop. i looked up into his blank face. i...i can't remember ever being more scared...ever. there was really only one thing left i could do: shoot the bastard.
i might as well have shot a rock for all the good it did, but i shot him. and he wasn't pleased by that.
when i woke up, i was tied to some chair. redlight was there...although it may have been a different redlight, i don't know. he looked shorter. it was hard to tell. my head hurt like hell. "so," said redlight, "are you going to reconsider our offer?"
my response: "you're going to get in a lot of trouble for this."
"that's what you think, daniel. now answer the question."
"that's officer smith to you. and the answer is no."
redlight pulled out a knife. "i don't think you fully understand the gravity of the situation. you can either join us, or you can suffer the consequences. so, what's it going to be?"
"my answer's the same. now let me go."
redlight pressed the knife against my face. it was so sharp that i didn't realize it'd pierced the skin until i felt blood drip down my face. "this is your last chance, 'officer'. join us, or what happens to you next will be your own fault."
"...no."
there was a few seconds of silence. i thought i was going to die.
i almost wish he had just killed me.
what happened after was...blurry. but i know that he started with my face, carving the operator symbol into it, then...a needle, thread, pulling my mouth shut so i couldn't scream. then they moved on to my hands. there was a lot of blood...but...it got worse. so much worse. because my memories were next and...
i...can't even describe...
it was worse than all the pain. it was worse than the fear. it was even worse than what happened with slender man earlier in the month. i was...i was helpless, completely helpless...
i was losing myself.
and then everything went dark, and i was standing in the room again. slender man was still there, and so was redlight and other me. before i could ask why they'd shown me that, i was suddenly bombarded with memories. the things i've had to do since i met alora. the proxies i killed. the fact that i had to wipe her mind.
and other things i've done. before, i didn't know i had powers, but i was still able to use them unconsciously. i'd...i'd manipulated people. i...i even used them on alice once. i didn't know, but still i did that.
when it was over, redlight spoke: "that is why we approached you, daniel. you are more like us than you're willing to admit. you belong with us. you just needed a little...initiative to see that.
"the offer is still open. you can join us, daniel. you should join us."
slender man said nothing.
and i actually considered the offer.
because...i really believed him.
and then i remembered what all of you said. and i remembered what redlight had done to me. and then i got pissed. and it just so happens that yes, i can randomly summon weapons while in my own mind, because (as alora put it when i told her about it), "it's my f*cking mind, i can do what i want. bitch."
i took out redlight first--crowbar to the head, and it felt a lot better than it should. but when i turned, slender man wasn't there. he was standing on the other side of the room, just looking at me.
so be it
and then he left.
it was just me and other me. when i turned to face him, he was smiling.
and then i woke up.
what i learned from this situation:
1. i am a moron.
2. slender man kept me alive because he wanted to see if he could use me.
3. since i refused him, he will probably focus on killing me now.
4. i dislike having these powers more than ever now.
5. knowing what happened to me doesn't make things any easier. but at least i know.
sorry about the massive post. a lot of things happened.
and you know what? i actually feel better. i don't know why, but i do. if nothing else, i know that i can resist in some way.
but i think things got a lot more dangerous.
-daniel
two: yeah, we know about the computer. alora kept booting me off every three seconds to read the comments people are leaving. it's...pretty surreal.
three: the self-mind reading was a success and...
and i know now.
i know why i ended up like this.
it was in there, locked up. i mean that literally. when i...went inside my own mind, i don't know what you'd call it, i was in a room. it was a disaster. there were boxes everywhere, some opened and dumped over, some closed, all stacked haphazardly. there was dust everywhere, and the walls were covered in writing.
i'm not crazy. i'm not a monster. open the box open the box. don't open the box.
the handwriting was my own. i guess i'm crazier than i thought.
but i wasn't the only one there, because when i looked up from the writing on the walls...
he was there.
and the man in red.
and i was there. except it was me before all of this, with no scars and a voice. other me had a rope around his neck, not that he showed any signs he wanted to run away. he was just sitting on the ground, writing on the walls more. muttering.
hello daniel
i remembered that voice.
there's something we want to show you daniel
and the man in red handed me a key.
i wasn't sure i wanted to take it. if he wanted me to see it, it must be bad. but then other me looked at me. met my eyes and nodded.
i took the key.
the key opened one of the boxes, and in the box was a memory.
i had been investigating a series of murders in my town. the murders i remembered before...we had no idea who was responsible. we just thought it was another human being. a very sick human being, granted, but a human nonetheless.
we didn't have any leads. then i received the note.
the tutorial. getuphigh.blogspot.com
that was when it started. i read so many of the blogs. some of the people i know now...dreams in darkness...that's how i knew their names, scott. it was that blog that made me realize this wasn't just a game.
i had two theories. one, someone had also read these blogs and decided it would be fun to play slender man.
the other...
well, maybe this was real.
of course, i didn't tell anyone about that theory. how could i? if i walked up to the police chief and announced that i thought the murders were being performed by an eldritch abomination that shouldn't exist, i would be laughed out of the station. i didn't even tell alice.
i was about to tell the others about the first theory, when i received another message. this time it was a voice message, telling me to meet him at this old cabin near some woods. i did the stupid thing and went by myself. i was a bit of a moron back then.
but i didn't really know what i was dealing with. i mean...i knew what slender man was, i knew about his mooks, and i knew what both were capable of. but i wasn't quite willing to believe it was real. not entirely.
when i went to the location, i met him for the first time. a man in a red sweater, standing in the darkest corner of the room.
he said his name was redlight.
he told me that it was slender man who was killing those people, and that they weren't important. i was the one he wanted to talk to. he told me that i had certain abilities. i know what he was talking about now, but at the time i thought he was just talking out his ass. then he told me that he was like me. and there were other redlights like me. not many, but they existed. and he wanted me to work for them.
he wanted me to be a redlight.
i turned him down, partially because i thought the entire thing was bullshit, and partially because i knew what redlight could do, and i wasn't going to be a part of it. i went to leave and when i turned around...
he was there. slender man, in the flesh. everything seemed to stop. i couldn't move, i could barely breathe. and let me tell you, he did not look happy, but his anger was directed at redlight. redlight was talking to slender man, and i don't remember all of what he said because i wasn't paying attention. i was torn between panicking and trying to figure out how to get out of there. but before i could figure anything out, slender man was looking at me. and i heard his voice in my head: you will join me
come to me
and...i wanted to.
he was terrifying and repulsive and i knew what he had done, but i wanted to. i wanted to join him. i even took a few steps towards him.
but--and i don't know how i did this--i snapped out of it. i actually pulled out my gun and told him i wasn't going anywhere with him. i think i may have said that he was under arrest, because that would explain why redlight started laughing.
slender man did it again, but this time he pushed harder. come to me, child
i remember walking towards him, even though i didn't want to. i was inches from him when i managed to make my feet stop. i looked up into his blank face. i...i can't remember ever being more scared...ever. there was really only one thing left i could do: shoot the bastard.
i might as well have shot a rock for all the good it did, but i shot him. and he wasn't pleased by that.
when i woke up, i was tied to some chair. redlight was there...although it may have been a different redlight, i don't know. he looked shorter. it was hard to tell. my head hurt like hell. "so," said redlight, "are you going to reconsider our offer?"
my response: "you're going to get in a lot of trouble for this."
"that's what you think, daniel. now answer the question."
"that's officer smith to you. and the answer is no."
redlight pulled out a knife. "i don't think you fully understand the gravity of the situation. you can either join us, or you can suffer the consequences. so, what's it going to be?"
"my answer's the same. now let me go."
redlight pressed the knife against my face. it was so sharp that i didn't realize it'd pierced the skin until i felt blood drip down my face. "this is your last chance, 'officer'. join us, or what happens to you next will be your own fault."
"...no."
there was a few seconds of silence. i thought i was going to die.
i almost wish he had just killed me.
what happened after was...blurry. but i know that he started with my face, carving the operator symbol into it, then...a needle, thread, pulling my mouth shut so i couldn't scream. then they moved on to my hands. there was a lot of blood...but...it got worse. so much worse. because my memories were next and...
i...can't even describe...
it was worse than all the pain. it was worse than the fear. it was even worse than what happened with slender man earlier in the month. i was...i was helpless, completely helpless...
i was losing myself.
and then everything went dark, and i was standing in the room again. slender man was still there, and so was redlight and other me. before i could ask why they'd shown me that, i was suddenly bombarded with memories. the things i've had to do since i met alora. the proxies i killed. the fact that i had to wipe her mind.
and other things i've done. before, i didn't know i had powers, but i was still able to use them unconsciously. i'd...i'd manipulated people. i...i even used them on alice once. i didn't know, but still i did that.
when it was over, redlight spoke: "that is why we approached you, daniel. you are more like us than you're willing to admit. you belong with us. you just needed a little...initiative to see that.
"the offer is still open. you can join us, daniel. you should join us."
slender man said nothing.
and i actually considered the offer.
because...i really believed him.
and then i remembered what all of you said. and i remembered what redlight had done to me. and then i got pissed. and it just so happens that yes, i can randomly summon weapons while in my own mind, because (as alora put it when i told her about it), "it's my f*cking mind, i can do what i want. bitch."
i took out redlight first--crowbar to the head, and it felt a lot better than it should. but when i turned, slender man wasn't there. he was standing on the other side of the room, just looking at me.
so be it
and then he left.
it was just me and other me. when i turned to face him, he was smiling.
and then i woke up.
what i learned from this situation:
1. i am a moron.
2. slender man kept me alive because he wanted to see if he could use me.
3. since i refused him, he will probably focus on killing me now.
4. i dislike having these powers more than ever now.
5. knowing what happened to me doesn't make things any easier. but at least i know.
sorry about the massive post. a lot of things happened.
and you know what? i actually feel better. i don't know why, but i do. if nothing else, i know that i can resist in some way.
but i think things got a lot more dangerous.
-daniel
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Daniel decided to try the self-mind-reading thing. It took some doing, but he managed to "go under" so to speak about an hour ago.
He's just been lying on the bed for the past hour.
Nothing too weird happened at first, until about ten minutes ago, when...
Well, I noticed a noise, and when I thought it was weird at first, but then I...I looked over at Daniel and I realized it was him, he's muttering.
He's talking.
...I...I don't know if that means anything but...
He has a voice.
Holy effing shit, he has a voice.
He's just been lying on the bed for the past hour.
Nothing too weird happened at first, until about ten minutes ago, when...
Well, I noticed a noise, and when I thought it was weird at first, but then I...I looked over at Daniel and I realized it was him, he's muttering.
He's talking.
...I...I don't know if that means anything but...
He has a voice.
Holy effing shit, he has a voice.
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
a question
are frequent nosebleeds...normal, considering my situation?
i've been having them since...that day. and they've been getting worse. alora's freaked out and frankly so am i.
and...
the dreams have been getting worse.
he's always there, even in the ones that aren't nightmares. just in the background. watching me.
and the man in the red sweater...
i think i'm losing my mind.
i've been having them since...that day. and they've been getting worse. alora's freaked out and frankly so am i.
and...
the dreams have been getting worse.
he's always there, even in the ones that aren't nightmares. just in the background. watching me.
and the man in the red sweater...
i think i'm losing my mind.
Friday, April 15, 2011
alora, please don't read this
i'm sorry
i have to...
if i don't tell someone about this, i'll lose it and i can't lose it right now.
he isn't faceless, you know.
when i woke up in the woods and he stalked me, i...at one point, i tried to hide in some bushes and he found me. grabbed me by the neck.
showed me his face.
he...
it only looks like has no face because the skin isn't...there aren't any breaks, no eyelids or anything, if he wants to open his eyes he has to tear the skin and...i don't...
he has to tear the skin, and it bleeds, and his eyes are so black...
and his mouth has to tear open too, and the sound if you've ever heard flesh tearing you know what it sounds like and i can't get it out of my head...and...his teeth...the mouth, it's not the right size, and the teeth...
and when i looked into his eyes, it was like i was standing on the edge of nothing. that's what was in those eyes, nothing. just black emptiness, going on forever.
i don't see how he could trick people into finding him comforting because he's not, he's not comforting, he's a monster, he's an abyss, he is the nothingness in those eyes. ancient, dark, hateful, terror.
every time i close my eyes i see that face and he won't go away.
and when he took us both...
alora, poor alora, he went after her the worst.
he must have known...
and then...
the things i did in there, the things i had to do...
there were...there were these proxies, and...
i killed them.
i killed all of them, every last one.
i told alora to cover her ears and sing to drown it out, and i...i just killed them.
they...they were people, they had families, one was a girl about alora's age...maybe younger, but i killed her too. and the way she looked at me when i did it...
chimere is right.
he rapes the mind.
pain, that's all i felt, he took all my memories and twisted them and perverted them, and the pain, the pain, but it was worse when he started on her. so much worse because i couldn't do anything. i couldn't move, i could barely breathe, the last thing i heard before i passed out was her screams.
i wanted to help her...
dammit, i'm supposed to keep her safe...
i kept her safe by violating her too.
she might forgive me, but i...i don't think i can forgive myself.
i know she said it was the right thing to, and so did all of you, but you haven't been through what i've been through, you don't know what it's like waking up to know that someone has screwed with your mind. dammit, i still don't have all my memories back. i may know who i am, and i may remember bits and peices about my past, but there are gaps. the gaps are huge. i gave her gaps. i did that to her.
redlight is right. i am a monster.
i have to...
if i don't tell someone about this, i'll lose it and i can't lose it right now.
he isn't faceless, you know.
when i woke up in the woods and he stalked me, i...at one point, i tried to hide in some bushes and he found me. grabbed me by the neck.
showed me his face.
he...
it only looks like has no face because the skin isn't...there aren't any breaks, no eyelids or anything, if he wants to open his eyes he has to tear the skin and...i don't...
he has to tear the skin, and it bleeds, and his eyes are so black...
and his mouth has to tear open too, and the sound if you've ever heard flesh tearing you know what it sounds like and i can't get it out of my head...and...his teeth...the mouth, it's not the right size, and the teeth...
and when i looked into his eyes, it was like i was standing on the edge of nothing. that's what was in those eyes, nothing. just black emptiness, going on forever.
i don't see how he could trick people into finding him comforting because he's not, he's not comforting, he's a monster, he's an abyss, he is the nothingness in those eyes. ancient, dark, hateful, terror.
every time i close my eyes i see that face and he won't go away.
and when he took us both...
alora, poor alora, he went after her the worst.
he must have known...
and then...
the things i did in there, the things i had to do...
there were...there were these proxies, and...
i killed them.
i killed all of them, every last one.
i told alora to cover her ears and sing to drown it out, and i...i just killed them.
they...they were people, they had families, one was a girl about alora's age...maybe younger, but i killed her too. and the way she looked at me when i did it...
chimere is right.
he rapes the mind.
pain, that's all i felt, he took all my memories and twisted them and perverted them, and the pain, the pain, but it was worse when he started on her. so much worse because i couldn't do anything. i couldn't move, i could barely breathe, the last thing i heard before i passed out was her screams.
i wanted to help her...
dammit, i'm supposed to keep her safe...
i kept her safe by violating her too.
she might forgive me, but i...i don't think i can forgive myself.
i know she said it was the right thing to, and so did all of you, but you haven't been through what i've been through, you don't know what it's like waking up to know that someone has screwed with your mind. dammit, i still don't have all my memories back. i may know who i am, and i may remember bits and peices about my past, but there are gaps. the gaps are huge. i gave her gaps. i did that to her.
redlight is right. i am a monster.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
I Saw Minecraft Creeper Today
He was...
Chimere effed him up HARD.
He was sitting funny and he looked like he was in a lot of pain. He also looked like someone had given him a black eye at some point, but according to Daniel, Chimere never punched him in the face. Maybe Slender distributes bitch slaps now, I don't know.
Anyway, I...is it weird that I actually felt terrible? I mean, yeah, I still hate him and think he's an asshole, but seeing him like that...
I just...I actually apologized to him after class.
I know, I'm stupid and soft, but I felt bad. He just...it was sad. And I felt terrible.
His response:
"Never, EVER apologize to me again, you little BITCH. Do you hear me?"
And then, as he started walking away:
"I would keep an eye on that alter ego of yours. She is no better than I am and you know it."
...What scares me is that he's probably right. I know she's on our side and all, but...
That was...that was just overkill. That wasn't necessary. If I had to hurt him I'd just take him out and get it over with. I wouldn't...that was inches away from torture. It's not right.
Daniel's still a little...out of it after everything that happened.
I wish there was something I could do.
~Alora
Chimere effed him up HARD.
He was sitting funny and he looked like he was in a lot of pain. He also looked like someone had given him a black eye at some point, but according to Daniel, Chimere never punched him in the face. Maybe Slender distributes bitch slaps now, I don't know.
Anyway, I...is it weird that I actually felt terrible? I mean, yeah, I still hate him and think he's an asshole, but seeing him like that...
I just...I actually apologized to him after class.
I know, I'm stupid and soft, but I felt bad. He just...it was sad. And I felt terrible.
His response:
"Never, EVER apologize to me again, you little BITCH. Do you hear me?"
And then, as he started walking away:
"I would keep an eye on that alter ego of yours. She is no better than I am and you know it."
...What scares me is that he's probably right. I know she's on our side and all, but...
That was...that was just overkill. That wasn't necessary. If I had to hurt him I'd just take him out and get it over with. I wouldn't...that was inches away from torture. It's not right.
Daniel's still a little...out of it after everything that happened.
I wish there was something I could do.
~Alora
Monday, April 11, 2011
Hi
Guess we won, huh?
Two things to address.
One, I know what Daniel did, and I'm not mad at him. It...it was the right thing to do. I would be a mess right now if he hadn't done it. I do know the basics of what happened, but...I'm not sure I can handle details yet. Even with what little I do know, it's...hard to think about. Especially seeing how he's been handling it. I know later I'm going to have to know some of it, for his sake, because he needs to talk to SOMEone about it...but...I don't know. Not now.
I feel so selfish doing that, though.
Thanks for telling him that he did the right thing. I think it's helping, but he's still beating himself up about it. Also, Maze? Not cool. Just...not cool. You suck.
Two, I think I know who Chimere is and it freaks me the hell out.
See, when I was little, my mom used to tell me stories about a warrior princess named Chimere. You know, the sort of progressive fairy tale where the princess saves her damn self and all that? I dunno, I think she wanted me to realize that sometimes you've got to figure shit out yourself. Anyway, when I was a kid, whenever I would get freaked out about something (which happened a lot--I'm still socially awkward sometimes, but trust me, back then, I was a DISASTER around other people) I would just pretend I was Chimere. It was weird, but it helped me cope, and I was a kid. I stopped doing it after I was like...ten? Twelve? The point is, I haven't done it in years.
What scares me is that...
I really don't like talking about it, but...the time I developed nictophobia...
I was four. I was at my aunt's house. We were playing hide and seek. It was the evening. I, master of all things stupid, thought it would be a great idea to go hide in the woods.
I got lost.
I was out there all damn night, four years old, utterly terrified. Not to mention the fact that there are a LOT of critters out where my aunt lives (you know, raccoons and squirrels and shit), and when you're four and year some noctornal animal scurrying around, it might as well be the freaking devil trying to reap your soul. That's how bad it was.
I still get nightmares about it sometimes.
The last thing I remember was hiding in this little patch of bushes and crying.
Then I "woke up" back home. My family was there and everyone was freaking out. Apparently I'd just walked back to the house by myself, but to this day I don't remember ever leaving those bushes. I just was there, then I was home.
And...that's kind of what happened yesterday. I remember...vague stuff, I remember it was bad and I was terrified (all blurred, thanks to D) and next thing I know, I'm waking up this morning and everything looks...normal-ish. I say "normal-ish" because I haven't quite cleaned up all the bloodstains, I no longer have a mirror, and I'm down two shirts (I didn't like either of them anyway).
From what little internet research I've been able to do, this lapse in memory is sort of consistent with an alternate personality. Basically, my theory is that Chimere is this...alter-ego I made for myself that evolved into a split personality who takes over when things get too much for me (oddly enough, I am...strangely proud that this has only happened twice in my life. I guess I'm more resilient than I thought). The fact that I used to pretend I was her is probably part of the reason she considers herself "Me-But-Not", because...well, that's what she is.
I'm grateful she popped up when she did, but...I'm not sure I like her so much.
I mean, for Heaven's sake, she stabbed MC! Stabbed him. Repeatedly. I might rant about how I'm going to kill the guy, and I might hurt someone in self-defense, but...not like that. Never like that. One of my towels is ruined because of all the blood. I wouldn't just...I wouldn't do that. No. Never.
But she did, and the fact that a person capable of that is lurking in my brain really freaks me the hell out.
I don't want to be her again. I just...want to stay me. I want control of my own brain and my own actions.
Daniel doesn't like her too much either. He says she's kinda scary. Great. I have a psycho in my head.
I haven't read any of the old blog posts (not sure I want to yet), but if she posted anything, did she seem crazy to you guys? At all? Just wondering...
I talked to Vivi.
I'm...not sure why I did that.
But...it's good to see they're still safe.
Stay safe, you guys.
~Alora
Two things to address.
One, I know what Daniel did, and I'm not mad at him. It...it was the right thing to do. I would be a mess right now if he hadn't done it. I do know the basics of what happened, but...I'm not sure I can handle details yet. Even with what little I do know, it's...hard to think about. Especially seeing how he's been handling it. I know later I'm going to have to know some of it, for his sake, because he needs to talk to SOMEone about it...but...I don't know. Not now.
I feel so selfish doing that, though.
Thanks for telling him that he did the right thing. I think it's helping, but he's still beating himself up about it. Also, Maze? Not cool. Just...not cool. You suck.
Two, I think I know who Chimere is and it freaks me the hell out.
See, when I was little, my mom used to tell me stories about a warrior princess named Chimere. You know, the sort of progressive fairy tale where the princess saves her damn self and all that? I dunno, I think she wanted me to realize that sometimes you've got to figure shit out yourself. Anyway, when I was a kid, whenever I would get freaked out about something (which happened a lot--I'm still socially awkward sometimes, but trust me, back then, I was a DISASTER around other people) I would just pretend I was Chimere. It was weird, but it helped me cope, and I was a kid. I stopped doing it after I was like...ten? Twelve? The point is, I haven't done it in years.
What scares me is that...
I really don't like talking about it, but...the time I developed nictophobia...
I was four. I was at my aunt's house. We were playing hide and seek. It was the evening. I, master of all things stupid, thought it would be a great idea to go hide in the woods.
I got lost.
I was out there all damn night, four years old, utterly terrified. Not to mention the fact that there are a LOT of critters out where my aunt lives (you know, raccoons and squirrels and shit), and when you're four and year some noctornal animal scurrying around, it might as well be the freaking devil trying to reap your soul. That's how bad it was.
I still get nightmares about it sometimes.
The last thing I remember was hiding in this little patch of bushes and crying.
Then I "woke up" back home. My family was there and everyone was freaking out. Apparently I'd just walked back to the house by myself, but to this day I don't remember ever leaving those bushes. I just was there, then I was home.
And...that's kind of what happened yesterday. I remember...vague stuff, I remember it was bad and I was terrified (all blurred, thanks to D) and next thing I know, I'm waking up this morning and everything looks...normal-ish. I say "normal-ish" because I haven't quite cleaned up all the bloodstains, I no longer have a mirror, and I'm down two shirts (I didn't like either of them anyway).
From what little internet research I've been able to do, this lapse in memory is sort of consistent with an alternate personality. Basically, my theory is that Chimere is this...alter-ego I made for myself that evolved into a split personality who takes over when things get too much for me (oddly enough, I am...strangely proud that this has only happened twice in my life. I guess I'm more resilient than I thought). The fact that I used to pretend I was her is probably part of the reason she considers herself "Me-But-Not", because...well, that's what she is.
I'm grateful she popped up when she did, but...I'm not sure I like her so much.
I mean, for Heaven's sake, she stabbed MC! Stabbed him. Repeatedly. I might rant about how I'm going to kill the guy, and I might hurt someone in self-defense, but...not like that. Never like that. One of my towels is ruined because of all the blood. I wouldn't just...I wouldn't do that. No. Never.
But she did, and the fact that a person capable of that is lurking in my brain really freaks me the hell out.
I don't want to be her again. I just...want to stay me. I want control of my own brain and my own actions.
Daniel doesn't like her too much either. He says she's kinda scary. Great. I have a psycho in my head.
I haven't read any of the old blog posts (not sure I want to yet), but if she posted anything, did she seem crazy to you guys? At all? Just wondering...
I talked to Vivi.
I'm...not sure why I did that.
But...it's good to see they're still safe.
Stay safe, you guys.
~Alora
i...i...
i just...
whathe did...
i don't...
i don't...i can't talk about it right now.
i passed out at some point and when i woke up...alora was there but it wasn't alora. it was...someone else inside alora, i don't know. she said her name was chimere and she tried to explain it to me, but my head hurt, so i wasn't really registering what was going on.
she doesn't act like alora at all. it's...i don't even know how to feel.
but...she told me...
she told me there was something i needed to do to help alora. she said i needed to make her forget. i needed to make her forget what had happened today, or most of what happened this week if i could.
i told her no. i told her that i didn't know if i could do that and even if i could i wasn't going to. i wasn't going to invade her like that, i wasn't going...
and she told me...she said, "daniel, do you know what's going to happen to her if you just let her stay like this? i'm not going to stay here forever, and when she wakes up, she is going to be a mess. do you know what she's been through? at least you have your bullshit mind powers. you could fight back. she couldn't fight back.he violated her and she was defenseless. she's going to wake up and remember everything, and that will drive her insane. she might never recover. i know that if you could make yourself forget everything that happened this week, everything you did, and everything he did to you, you'd do it. it's a thousand times worse for her. if you don't try, then she will go through hell. do you understand? you have to try."
...she was right.
so i...
i'm able to...
she...
i couldn't make the memories go away entirely, but specifics are gone...it'll just be a blur of awfulness, everything that happened today, the woods, some of the stuff that happened since last sunday...it's just smudged, she'll know what happened was terrible, but she won't be able to remember exactly what happened...
i just went inside her mind like that...uninvited...messing with her memories like that...
tell me i did the right thing.
please, tell me i did the right thing...
i just...
what
i don't...
i don't...i can't talk about it right now.
i passed out at some point and when i woke up...alora was there but it wasn't alora. it was...someone else inside alora, i don't know. she said her name was chimere and she tried to explain it to me, but my head hurt, so i wasn't really registering what was going on.
she doesn't act like alora at all. it's...i don't even know how to feel.
but...she told me...
she told me there was something i needed to do to help alora. she said i needed to make her forget. i needed to make her forget what had happened today, or most of what happened this week if i could.
i told her no. i told her that i didn't know if i could do that and even if i could i wasn't going to. i wasn't going to invade her like that, i wasn't going...
and she told me...she said, "daniel, do you know what's going to happen to her if you just let her stay like this? i'm not going to stay here forever, and when she wakes up, she is going to be a mess. do you know what she's been through? at least you have your bullshit mind powers. you could fight back. she couldn't fight back.
...she was right.
so i...
i'm able to...
she...
i couldn't make the memories go away entirely, but specifics are gone...it'll just be a blur of awfulness, everything that happened today, the woods, some of the stuff that happened since last sunday...it's just smudged, she'll know what happened was terrible, but she won't be able to remember exactly what happened...
i just went inside her mind like that...uninvited...messing with her memories like that...
tell me i did the right thing.
please, tell me i did the right thing...
Sunday, April 10, 2011
Reassurance
I'm sure you're full of questions, so I'm just going to answer them right now.
1. No this is not Alora. Technically.
2. No, I do not aim to hurt her or Daniel. I'm here to protect her, and by extension Daniel, because we like him and it would be bad if he died.
3. Don't worry, I won't be sticking around very long. You'll have Alora back soon. I'm going to try not to make this a regular thing. But with this whole Slender Man bullshit, you'll be seeing me again.
And the big question I'm sure you're all asking is: what the hell happened?
Well, I don't really know what happened at first, but I do know this: Slender Man woke me up.
Last time I surfaced, she was like...what, four? It was when she developed her nictophobia. I'm the only reason she got out of those woods. She never really needed me after that. Well, until today.
I get why Slender Man is known as a Mmemetic Molestor. He doesn't do anything physical. It's all in the head. He's a mind rapist, that's what he is. He violated her. So I woke up. He wasn't expecting that, so he let go. I only confused him for a few seconds, though. After that, I think he was...interested.
Then I stabbed Lucien. Several times.
I know, right? And it felt freaking good. Who's the bitch now, huh? Son of a whore...
And I guess Reach was right about Renevants being bullshit, because he didn't heal at all. He seemed pretty shocked by this. Slender Man didn't care that I'd just beat up one of his minions, though. He...
He laughed.
I hope none of you never have to hear that sound, because it is freaking me out just thinking about it. It was this...chuckle, this low, deep chuckle. And it wasn't audible, it's in your head, it's...
Ugh.
Anyway, so I don't really know what I did, but he just picked up Lucien and left. I don't know if he just randomly decided we passed his trials or what that laugh meant but I'm not complaining.
Anyway, Daniel's kind of passed out after the physical abuse and the mind rape, so he's down for the count. I'm finally done patching up him and us. I had to tear up some of our shirts. I hope Alora's not too pissed.
Daniel will probably be fine after some rest, and Alora's basically okay, physically, but when I leave...
She's...not going to be okay, is she?
F*ck.
Going to have to do something about that.
Well, there is one thing I can do, but he's not going to like it. Whatever, I'll talk to him about it later.
I'm going to be sticking around until Daniel wakes up. Someone has to get all the blood off the floor.
Don't worry, they're both safe with me.
~Chimere
1. No this is not Alora. Technically.
2. No, I do not aim to hurt her or Daniel. I'm here to protect her, and by extension Daniel, because we like him and it would be bad if he died.
3. Don't worry, I won't be sticking around very long. You'll have Alora back soon. I'm going to try not to make this a regular thing. But with this whole Slender Man bullshit, you'll be seeing me again.
And the big question I'm sure you're all asking is: what the hell happened?
Well, I don't really know what happened at first, but I do know this: Slender Man woke me up.
Last time I surfaced, she was like...what, four? It was when she developed her nictophobia. I'm the only reason she got out of those woods. She never really needed me after that. Well, until today.
I get why Slender Man is known as a Mmemetic Molestor. He doesn't do anything physical. It's all in the head. He's a mind rapist, that's what he is. He violated her. So I woke up. He wasn't expecting that, so he let go. I only confused him for a few seconds, though. After that, I think he was...interested.
Then I stabbed Lucien. Several times.
I know, right? And it felt freaking good. Who's the bitch now, huh? Son of a whore...
And I guess Reach was right about Renevants being bullshit, because he didn't heal at all. He seemed pretty shocked by this. Slender Man didn't care that I'd just beat up one of his minions, though. He...
He laughed.
I hope none of you never have to hear that sound, because it is freaking me out just thinking about it. It was this...chuckle, this low, deep chuckle. And it wasn't audible, it's in your head, it's...
Ugh.
Anyway, so I don't really know what I did, but he just picked up Lucien and left. I don't know if he just randomly decided we passed his trials or what that laugh meant but I'm not complaining.
Anyway, Daniel's kind of passed out after the physical abuse and the mind rape, so he's down for the count. I'm finally done patching up him and us. I had to tear up some of our shirts. I hope Alora's not too pissed.
Daniel will probably be fine after some rest, and Alora's basically okay, physically, but when I leave...
She's...not going to be okay, is she?
F*ck.
Going to have to do something about that.
Well, there is one thing I can do, but he's not going to like it. Whatever, I'll talk to him about it later.
I'm going to be sticking around until Daniel wakes up. Someone has to get all the blood off the floor.
Don't worry, they're both safe with me.
~Chimere
Hi guys. We were in the woods all day today, did you know that? We were stuck in there. Mr. Suit took us for a little ride. Wheee.
Hey, you know what's kind of funny? Even though I'm really scared of the dark I've always liked these really dark bands. Isn't that weird? I've been singing a lot today. Daniel told me to plug my ears and close my eyes and sing, so I did. I was singing for a really long time before he came back and told me I could stop.
But I didn't stop because if I stopped I would hear him and if I can't hear him he can't find me, right? That's how it works. If I don't see him and I can't hear him he isn't there. And if he isn't there I'm safe and Daniel's safe and my brother is safe and mommy and daddy are safe and we're all safe.
I haven't stopped singing yet. I don't sound so good anymore, but I don't wanna stop. I'm scared to stop.
No, I'm not scared, I'm fine. Everything's fine now, right? Everything's fine, we're back home and he's not here and I'm still singing so everything's fine.
I don't remember where this blood came from.
Daniel's got a lot of it on him.
He's washing it off now.
Not scared, not scared.
Not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not I'm not I'm not
it's daniel
we're...not okay right now
i don't want to talk about it but
i don't know if we'll survive tomorrow.
Hey, you know what's kind of funny? Even though I'm really scared of the dark I've always liked these really dark bands. Isn't that weird? I've been singing a lot today. Daniel told me to plug my ears and close my eyes and sing, so I did. I was singing for a really long time before he came back and told me I could stop.
But I didn't stop because if I stopped I would hear him and if I can't hear him he can't find me, right? That's how it works. If I don't see him and I can't hear him he isn't there. And if he isn't there I'm safe and Daniel's safe and my brother is safe and mommy and daddy are safe and we're all safe.
I haven't stopped singing yet. I don't sound so good anymore, but I don't wanna stop. I'm scared to stop.
No, I'm not scared, I'm fine. Everything's fine now, right? Everything's fine, we're back home and he's not here and I'm still singing so everything's fine.
I don't remember where this blood came from.
Daniel's got a lot of it on him.
He's washing it off now.
Not scared, not scared.
Not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not insane I'm not I'm not I'm not
it's daniel
we're...not okay right now
i don't want to talk about it but
i don't know if we'll survive tomorrow.
Friday, April 8, 2011
The Dreams in Which I'm Dying...
...Are the best I've ever had.
It's sad, but I actually kind of like that song.
I know what he's trying to do.
He's everywhere.
He's in every picture I've seen, he's in every reflection in every mirror, even though when I turn around he's not there.
Daniel can hear him whispering. No matter what he thinks about, what he listens to, he is there. He's always there.
This is today's trial.
I should be scared, but between the near-death experience I had on Wednesday and the Marble Hornets style cough I got yesterday that STILL hasn't gone away, I just...
I don't feel anything.
I was scared this morning, but as time has gone on, I've just been feeling...empty. Empty, so empty...
Drained and...
What's happening to me?
Why am I like this?
Is this what Daniel felt like after seeing him in the woods?
I don't want to see him anymore.
I just want things to be normal again.
I just want it to be normal...
It's sad, but I actually kind of like that song.
I know what he's trying to do.
He's everywhere.
He's in every picture I've seen, he's in every reflection in every mirror, even though when I turn around he's not there.
Daniel can hear him whispering. No matter what he thinks about, what he listens to, he is there. He's always there.
This is today's trial.
I should be scared, but between the near-death experience I had on Wednesday and the Marble Hornets style cough I got yesterday that STILL hasn't gone away, I just...
I don't feel anything.
I was scared this morning, but as time has gone on, I've just been feeling...empty. Empty, so empty...
Drained and...
What's happening to me?
Why am I like this?
Is this what Daniel felt like after seeing him in the woods?
I don't want to see him anymore.
I just want things to be normal again.
I just want it to be normal...
Thursday, April 7, 2011
FML
I'm amazed I can type this.
My hands are still shaking.
I...
I went to the library for a book. And...you know that whole thing about lost time? I think that's what happened to me. I was flipping through the book to make sure it was the right one...then I looked up at it was dark out.
Then...then Slender was in the library too, and...
I couldn't go outside, but I couldn't stay there. I ran, I left a post. He kept following me, always a little closer every time I turned around. And no one seemed to notice, I mean there weren't that many people to begin with but the ones that were there didn't seem to notice or care. I was...scared is the wrong word, I was terrified.
And I knew if I stayed any longer I was going to die.
So I...
I went outside and...
I was only out there for a few seconds, but I couldn't breathe, my chest hurt, my head felt light, I thought I was going to die...tried to keep running, couldn't...I fell down, thought for sure I was going to die...
Then next thing I knew, someone was grabbing me. Protecting me. I was too scared to even care who it was, and I don't really know what happened. I know Slender was there, he sort of stood there for a while, just watching, then he just...left.
And then the person practically carried me back to the dorm because I couldn't walk, my legs were weak and I was suffocating and I kept thinking think of the shows, think of the shows but it didn't help.
I really thought...
But then we were inside, and there was light, and I could breathe again.
It was Daniel.
He saw the post I left and ran out of the room to save me.
He did save me.
...My head hurts.
My hands are still shaking.
I...
I went to the library for a book. And...you know that whole thing about lost time? I think that's what happened to me. I was flipping through the book to make sure it was the right one...then I looked up at it was dark out.
Then...then Slender was in the library too, and...
I couldn't go outside, but I couldn't stay there. I ran, I left a post. He kept following me, always a little closer every time I turned around. And no one seemed to notice, I mean there weren't that many people to begin with but the ones that were there didn't seem to notice or care. I was...scared is the wrong word, I was terrified.
And I knew if I stayed any longer I was going to die.
So I...
I went outside and...
I was only out there for a few seconds, but I couldn't breathe, my chest hurt, my head felt light, I thought I was going to die...tried to keep running, couldn't...I fell down, thought for sure I was going to die...
Then next thing I knew, someone was grabbing me. Protecting me. I was too scared to even care who it was, and I don't really know what happened. I know Slender was there, he sort of stood there for a while, just watching, then he just...left.
And then the person practically carried me back to the dorm because I couldn't walk, my legs were weak and I was suffocating and I kept thinking think of the shows, think of the shows but it didn't help.
I really thought...
But then we were inside, and there was light, and I could breathe again.
It was Daniel.
He saw the post I left and ran out of the room to save me.
He did save me.
...My head hurts.
Wednesday, April 6, 2011
Oh hell...
I...I'm in the library. I only meant to get one book, but then I looked up and it was night...how did I loose that much time...?
I...I can't leave here...
Dark out...no lights...I need to be home...but I can't leave...
He's in here.
He's in here with me.
I lost him for a few seconds, but he's coming after me.
Have to leave can't leave have to leave can't, oh God help me, someone help me please...
He's...right in front of me...
No no no no no...
I...I'm in the library. I only meant to get one book, but then I looked up and it was night...how did I loose that much time...?
I...I can't leave here...
Dark out...no lights...I need to be home...but I can't leave...
He's in here.
He's in here with me.
I lost him for a few seconds, but he's coming after me.
Have to leave can't leave have to leave can't, oh God help me, someone help me please...
He's...right in front of me...
No no no no no...
Last Night
I fell asleep last night some time around 11:30. I didn't wake up until 12:10, when Daniel was contacting me telepathically to be let in. For those of you who are wondering what that's like, it's like whispering in your ear while standing behind you. Sorta creepy. But that's not the point. I ran downstairs to let him in and...well...he looked terrible. He'd lost his mask, his face was paler than I'd ever seen it, his face and hands were all scratched up, and he had these bruises on his neck. He couldn't use the pen and paper because his hands were shaking really badly, so he had to talk to me telepathically. He didn't tell me a lot, but from what I can tell, he was in the room when suddenly his head started hurting and he passed out. When he woke up, it was night, and he was in the woods.
With Slenderman.
And by "Trial of Endurance" they meant "run or he'll kill you."
And he kept this up for something like three or four hours.
...
He had this other injury on his back. It looked like a burn wound, perfectly round, right on his shoulder blade.
And he's...
There was a post in the drafts. This is what it said:
he's not blank. he's ancient, he's dark, he's an abyss. falling down down down
rows of teeth, razor-sharp...tearing skin...those eyes...
he has a face
you just can't see it because if you did you would go mad and i think i've gone mad. i close my eyes and it's all i see. those eyes are so black, the teeth the teeth, the sound it makes...blood, black blood, i can't get it off me...
that's why because it hurts. it must hurt him, showing himself so why did he do it
to show me that i'm nothing.
there is nothing comforting about him. he's repulsive, he's darkness, he's terror, fear, hatred he hates us why does he hate us so much? what are we to him?
nothing we're nothing that's all we are.
nothing nothing nothing
can't sleep
he can see me.
...He hasn't said a thing to me since last night.
All he's done is sit on the bed and stare at the wall. He won't even let me check on that burn on his back. And the bruises on his neck almost look like they're getting worse.
...I'm really scared right now.
With Slenderman.
And by "Trial of Endurance" they meant "run or he'll kill you."
And he kept this up for something like three or four hours.
...
He had this other injury on his back. It looked like a burn wound, perfectly round, right on his shoulder blade.
And he's...
There was a post in the drafts. This is what it said:
he's not blank. he's ancient, he's dark, he's an abyss. falling down down down
rows of teeth, razor-sharp...tearing skin...those eyes...
he has a face
you just can't see it because if you did you would go mad and i think i've gone mad. i close my eyes and it's all i see. those eyes are so black, the teeth the teeth, the sound it makes...blood, black blood, i can't get it off me...
that's why because it hurts. it must hurt him, showing himself so why did he do it
to show me that i'm nothing.
there is nothing comforting about him. he's repulsive, he's darkness, he's terror, fear, hatred he hates us why does he hate us so much? what are we to him?
nothing we're nothing that's all we are.
nothing nothing nothing
can't sleep
he can see me.
...He hasn't said a thing to me since last night.
All he's done is sit on the bed and stare at the wall. He won't even let me check on that burn on his back. And the bruises on his neck almost look like they're getting worse.
...I'm really scared right now.
Daniel's Alive
He's pretty scratched up and really tired but he's alive.
I'll post later and tell you guys what happened, but...
...I'm really scared right now.
~Alora
I'll post later and tell you guys what happened, but...
...I'm really scared right now.
~Alora
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
SHIT SHIT SHIT
Daniel's gone.
I...SHIT.
There was a note in the room.
Trial Three: Trial of Endurance.
For Worm Boy, not you.
If he lives, he will be back around midnight.
If he dies...you will know.
-Lucien
I got the note at five. Ran around the entire campus looking for him. He's nowhere on-campus. The only think I can think of is...
...There's a forest nearby.
The sun is setting soon.
I shouldn't...I'm not sure...the sun might set while I'm out...
He would go looking for me, no matter how scared I was, but I...I can't...
I don't know. I don't know what to do.
I don't know what to do...
I...SHIT.
There was a note in the room.
Trial Three: Trial of Endurance.
For Worm Boy, not you.
If he lives, he will be back around midnight.
If he dies...you will know.
-Lucien
I got the note at five. Ran around the entire campus looking for him. He's nowhere on-campus. The only think I can think of is...
...There's a forest nearby.
The sun is setting soon.
I shouldn't...I'm not sure...the sun might set while I'm out...
He would go looking for me, no matter how scared I was, but I...I can't...
I don't know. I don't know what to do.
I don't know what to do...
Monday, April 4, 2011
Shopping Trip and the Second Trial
I went shopping.
New supplies:
-Another flashlight (big one)
-Metal baseball bat
-Big-ass bag of chocolate, because dammit I deserve it
As for the second trial, well...
Not only did freaking MC follow me freaking EVERYwhere today, but now that I'm stuck in my room he's started banging on the door every half-hour, starting at 7:00. We stopped answering after the second time.
He's going to do that all night, isn't he?
Hell.
I need sleep. I desperately need sleep. I took two naps today, but that's not cutting it.
He keeps this up all night, then I won't sleep, and all he's going to have on his hands is a very pissed-off Alora. With a baseball bat. And then Daniel will kick him in the ribs repeatedly when I'm done bashing in his face.
(yes, yes i will. -daniel)
Hope you guys are having a better evening than we are.
~Alora
New supplies:
-Another flashlight (big one)
-Metal baseball bat
-Big-ass bag of chocolate, because dammit I deserve it
As for the second trial, well...
Not only did freaking MC follow me freaking EVERYwhere today, but now that I'm stuck in my room he's started banging on the door every half-hour, starting at 7:00. We stopped answering after the second time.
He's going to do that all night, isn't he?
Hell.
I need sleep. I desperately need sleep. I took two naps today, but that's not cutting it.
He keeps this up all night, then I won't sleep, and all he's going to have on his hands is a very pissed-off Alora. With a baseball bat. And then Daniel will kick him in the ribs repeatedly when I'm done bashing in his face.
(yes, yes i will. -daniel)
Hope you guys are having a better evening than we are.
~Alora
Over
The night is over.
Oh, thank God.
Basic bullet points outline of what happened:
-Lights went out.
-I had a panic attack.
-Daniel freaked out.
-Daniel found out what was going on, found everything with a light on it and turned it on.
-I was still panicking, so we ended up watching YouTube videos all night to try and calm me down.
Good things to come out of this:
-I discovered that there is an auto-tuned Charlie Sheen song (yes, I am dead serious).
-I found a flashlight I thought I'd lost.
Bad things to come out of this:
-I am dead tired.
-My head hurts.
-So does my back.
-My chest kinda hurts from all the hyperventilating.
-I'm still super-paranoid.
-Daniel is pissed as hell.
-I'm scared as hell.
-There is more of this shit to come.
F*ck.
~Alora
Oh, thank God.
Basic bullet points outline of what happened:
-Lights went out.
-I had a panic attack.
-Daniel freaked out.
-Daniel found out what was going on, found everything with a light on it and turned it on.
-I was still panicking, so we ended up watching YouTube videos all night to try and calm me down.
Good things to come out of this:
-I discovered that there is an auto-tuned Charlie Sheen song (yes, I am dead serious).
-I found a flashlight I thought I'd lost.
Bad things to come out of this:
-I am dead tired.
-My head hurts.
-So does my back.
-My chest kinda hurts from all the hyperventilating.
-I'm still super-paranoid.
-Daniel is pissed as hell.
-I'm scared as hell.
-There is more of this shit to come.
F*ck.
~Alora
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Greetings, and Welcome To...
...the Endurance Games!
No, this is not Alora, or that worm, Daniel. My name is Lucien, but you may all know me better as "Minecraft Creeper". What a charming nickname. Your little friend is incredibly mature, I can tell.
But that is not important.
Do not worry; they are both alive. They are just having a very bad evening.
See, every once in a while, we like to take the ones that think they are strong, that think they can handle whatever the Master throws at them with the power of love or friendship or positive thinking, and test their alleged strength. See how long it takes them to crack. For the next week, the Master and I are going to make their lives living hell. And if they come out the other side with their sanities intact, then it would seem that we have some competent enemies for a change. I myself would not mind if they did prove themselves. It makes the hunt that much more interesting.
Endurance Challenge #1: Turn off the lights.
No, not another labyrinth. Just a simple matter of breaking their lights, locking them in, and making sure that no one can hear the screams.
Poor, naive Alora. Whimpering like a coward.
Bang on that door all you want, Daniel. No one can hear you.
We will see how well they fared tomorrow.
Ta-taaa.
-Lucien
No, this is not Alora, or that worm, Daniel. My name is Lucien, but you may all know me better as "Minecraft Creeper". What a charming nickname. Your little friend is incredibly mature, I can tell.
But that is not important.
Do not worry; they are both alive. They are just having a very bad evening.
See, every once in a while, we like to take the ones that think they are strong, that think they can handle whatever the Master throws at them with the power of love or friendship or positive thinking, and test their alleged strength. See how long it takes them to crack. For the next week, the Master and I are going to make their lives living hell. And if they come out the other side with their sanities intact, then it would seem that we have some competent enemies for a change. I myself would not mind if they did prove themselves. It makes the hunt that much more interesting.
Endurance Challenge #1: Turn off the lights.
No, not another labyrinth. Just a simple matter of breaking their lights, locking them in, and making sure that no one can hear the screams.
Poor, naive Alora. Whimpering like a coward.
Bang on that door all you want, Daniel. No one can hear you.
We will see how well they fared tomorrow.
Ta-taaa.
-Lucien
Saturday, April 2, 2011
boycotting april fool's day
because every day i remember more and more little things and i'm starting to remember that this "holiday" sucked.
why? because either my coworkers were annoying or the teenagers in town were annoying. tp'ing things is not okay. i just thought i should throw that out there.
why are people even getting drunk on april fool's day? i can hear them outside, yelling and swearing. it doesn't make any damn sense!!
(Because they're dumbass college students? ~Alora)
yeah, basically.
speaking of things that anger me, there is a certain someone on my list who is going to get extra special attention if she tries anything, because if there is one thing i do not appreciate it's messing with people's lives and minds. don't you dare try to argue it was for her good. you violated her, that's what you did. violated. raped. that's what that was. you don't think i don't know what it's like, having your thoughts and memories intruded upon by some delusional f*ck? you didn't help her, you twisted her and hurt her, and i swear, if we ever meet, i'm going to show you what it's like. for your own good.
and you know something else? hope isn't naive, it's not stupid to think that we can fix this and that all of this will end, it keeps us sane, it keeps us fighting, i would've given up a long time ago if it hadn't been for alora and the hope that i could get back to something resembling normalcy, and even know i hope even though it's crazy and stupid and will probably never happen, but i keep thinking that it might, and if i believe it might at the very least it will get me through this and dammit, what is wrong with some of you people?!?! if you're not dying or going crazy you're just giving up or going turncoat or...
...sorry.
i'm not...i don't hate any of you, and i'm not mad at any of you. it's just...some of the things i've been reading lately, they just...
i don't know. i don't even know.
sometimes i want to punch a wall and i'm not even sure why.
was i always like this? was i always this angry?
i hope not. i'm not sure i like angry me. he's...sort of...
what am i capable of exactly?
i need a drink. or something. but i can't get drunk because that would be stupid. and alora's still a minor, so she doesn't have any form of alcohol. damn.
(The usual, then? Coffee, two packets instant? ~Alora)
...we have been spending way too much time together. people are going to think we're an item or something.
i should probably try to get some sleep. or have that coffee, either way.
-daniel
why? because either my coworkers were annoying or the teenagers in town were annoying. tp'ing things is not okay. i just thought i should throw that out there.
why are people even getting drunk on april fool's day? i can hear them outside, yelling and swearing. it doesn't make any damn sense!!
(Because they're dumbass college students? ~Alora)
yeah, basically.
speaking of things that anger me, there is a certain someone on my list who is going to get extra special attention if she tries anything, because if there is one thing i do not appreciate it's messing with people's lives and minds. don't you dare try to argue it was for her good. you violated her, that's what you did. violated. raped. that's what that was. you don't think i don't know what it's like, having your thoughts and memories intruded upon by some delusional f*ck? you didn't help her, you twisted her and hurt her, and i swear, if we ever meet, i'm going to show you what it's like. for your own good.
and you know something else? hope isn't naive, it's not stupid to think that we can fix this and that all of this will end, it keeps us sane, it keeps us fighting, i would've given up a long time ago if it hadn't been for alora and the hope that i could get back to something resembling normalcy, and even know i hope even though it's crazy and stupid and will probably never happen, but i keep thinking that it might, and if i believe it might at the very least it will get me through this and dammit, what is wrong with some of you people?!?! if you're not dying or going crazy you're just giving up or going turncoat or...
...sorry.
i'm not...i don't hate any of you, and i'm not mad at any of you. it's just...some of the things i've been reading lately, they just...
i don't know. i don't even know.
sometimes i want to punch a wall and i'm not even sure why.
was i always like this? was i always this angry?
i hope not. i'm not sure i like angry me. he's...sort of...
what am i capable of exactly?
i need a drink. or something. but i can't get drunk because that would be stupid. and alora's still a minor, so she doesn't have any form of alcohol. damn.
(The usual, then? Coffee, two packets instant? ~Alora)
...we have been spending way too much time together. people are going to think we're an item or something.
i should probably try to get some sleep. or have that coffee, either way.
-daniel
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