because every day i remember more and more little things and i'm starting to remember that this "holiday" sucked.
why? because either my coworkers were annoying or the teenagers in town were annoying. tp'ing things is not okay. i just thought i should throw that out there.
why are people even getting drunk on april fool's day? i can hear them outside, yelling and swearing. it doesn't make any damn sense!!
(Because they're dumbass college students? ~Alora)
speaking of things that anger me, there is a certain someone on my list who is going to get extra special attention if she tries anything, because if there is one thing i do not appreciate it's messing with people's lives and minds. don't you dare try to argue it was for her good. you violated her, that's what you did. violated. raped. that's what that was. you don't think i don't know what it's like, having your thoughts and memories intruded upon by some delusional f*ck? you didn't help her, you twisted her and hurt her, and i swear, if we ever meet, i'm going to show you what it's like. for your own good.
and you know something else? hope isn't naive, it's not stupid to think that we can fix this and that all of this will end, it keeps us sane, it keeps us fighting, i would've given up a long time ago if it hadn't been for alora and the hope that i could get back to something resembling normalcy, and even know i hope even though it's crazy and stupid and will probably never happen, but i keep thinking that it might, and if i believe it might at the very least it will get me through this and dammit, what is wrong with some of you people?!?! if you're not dying or going crazy you're just giving up or going turncoat or...
i'm not...i don't hate any of you, and i'm not mad at any of you. it's just...some of the things i've been reading lately, they just...
i don't know. i don't even know.
sometimes i want to punch a wall and i'm not even sure why.
was i always like this? was i always this angry?
i hope not. i'm not sure i like angry me. he's...sort of...
what am i capable of exactly?
i need a drink. or something. but i can't get drunk because that would be stupid. and alora's still a minor, so she doesn't have any form of alcohol. damn.
(The usual, then? Coffee, two packets instant? ~Alora)
...we have been spending way too much time together. people are going to think we're an item or something.
i should probably try to get some sleep. or have that coffee, either way.